The Hottest People Alive

I was browsing the interwebzzz just the other day and I suddenly ran into a pop-up ad whilst checking my YouTubz account. This really scared me because I normally use AdBlock ('cause 30 seconds of waiting for a video is too much for me to handle), and to see an ad pop up made me almost shat myself. Anyways, the ad was just a black box with the white text (in ugly-ass Comic Sans) saying "THE HOTTEST PEOPLE ALIVE PLEASE CLICK HERE TO SEE THEM!"
I clicked the ad, because Stupid is As the Main Character Does. It took me to a website called hawtiez4you.exe, and it was a spooky game where you had to use your cursor to navigate a maze laid out before you, and if you touched the walls then you would have to start from the beginning. This completely original game proved to be extremely easy and only took my thirty seconds to beat. Upon completing the last level, however, I was plagued in the anus by an aggressive image that I could not be rid of. It was so hot I got mega hard and it wouldn't go down for three weeks!!!!!!111
After seeing that mega hot image, I was left with no choice but to play through the game again, because I had to progress this story some more.
I played....
And played...
And played.....
The main reason I'm using these ellipsis is so I can make my pasta appear longer and therefore seem like I put more effort into it....
ANY FUCKING WAYS!
I played it again for the second time, but instead of showing me the super hot .gif of Jimmy Nutrin, I was shown a super sexy gallery! It was just so sexy I couldn't contain myself and I came everywhere so hard that I died.
If you ever find a pop up ad showing you super hot people, don't click on it, or you're next!
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This was taken from the diary of a dead man who lay dead, presumably dead as a result of dying.
His dead body was found in a pile of semen. Further investigations will not be conducted. But they ''did ''find some super hot pictures on his phone, from some super hot gallery of some kind...
The last picture is probably the hottest of them all...